Is Bliss not Enough?

I have heard and read in numerous spiritual related content that bliss is the highest attainment a human can attain, that it goes hand in hand with the attainment of nirvana or Buddhahood — and that with this attainment the end of suffering is arrived at by the human being. That he becomes compassionate, and loving and free from desire and attachment. The he becomes whole or complete. No more anxiety, turmoil, worry — just peace. That he become super intuitive…all that.

I do not think these claims are true. Not for me to be specific. I live in this state of bliss everyday of life. It is just there. I feel it so intensely sometimes it feel like me head is about to explode, it feels like some energy or something is oozing out from my forehead and from the top of my head. I don’t take drugs for it, no meditations or any practice — it is just there.

If the claims about attainment of bliss being the ultimate state of a human, then I should be the most peaceful human being alive right now. My inner should not even consist of a shred of turmoil. I should feel satisfied and content always. I shouldn’t feel the need to chase pleasure. Unfortunately the opposite is the case. I am tossed back and forth between bitter and sweet moods. I seek pleasure. My mind runs wild with thoughts and creating feelings. I still desire. I feel insufficient. I am an addict to certain things. I live in constant oscillation between inner turmoil and relative calm. Inner conflict still arises. I compare myself with others. I still feel confused and lost sometimes. Why?

Since there is utility or a practical application to everything in nature, I am convinced that this bliss has utility — I might not know how I can harness and use it for yet but I am convinced that it is useful in some way. This is something that I have discover for myself. The books, gurus and the whole bunch of them don’t have what it can be useful for. The self help authors say that it can be a tool to speed up manifestation and all that law of attraction jargon but I don’t buy it. There has to be something closer home. That does not require the intermediary of hope to deliver results. Law of Attraction and manifesting stuff has a lot hope in it. It is a scam. But hey, if it works for you then don’t believe me.

This is my most recent sincere quest — to find out what can this bliss do for me except for it just being here. I beats me down that this thing they say is an ultimate attainment, that is of value, that can transform my existence is here, and yet my life is still full of problems. I am still caught up in circular chases. I still feel like a beggar inside, like a flower trying to bloom without sunshine.

There goes my predicament.